A Tribute to Nana
Last week my Nana passed away. Technically she was my step-grandmother on my father’s side, but for me, she was the only grandmother I knew well. My grandmother, related to me by blood on my father’s side, had mental problems, and my father didn’t want her around us growing up for fear that she might do something to hurt us, so I only met her a few times. My grandmother on my mother’s side died when I was young, so I have only hazy memories of her. But Nana – that’s a different story.
This woman married my grandfather in her 20s and followed him to Kansas from Texas where he was a minister. She taught elementary school and played the piano at church. In fact, she was an amazing piano player. Even when she couldn’t remember who I was any more, she could play pretty much any tune you told her. It’s like her fingers just knew the exact notes to hit.
After they retired, they moved back to Texas to a town called Sweetwater, which is about a 4 hour drive from where I live, so much closer than Kansas. That’s when we started visiting more regularly. It was always a delight to visit her. There was always good food and lots of laughs. She had a very bright disposition and was happy most of the time. Not that she didn’t have her fair share of heartache, like we all do, but she seemed to bound back from it well.
What I remember was some of the good advice she gave me and how she always called me “Shug (short for Sugar). She was always very welcoming and happy to see us when we visited. After her husband died, she gradually began to lose her memory, until she really couldn’t remember the people closest to her. But even when she didn’t know who you were, she still acted like you were her best friend.
My aunt, her daughter, saw her on Thursday of last week. She was laughing and joking around as usual. But by Sunday, she was in the hospital with pneumonia, and by Wednesday, she had passed away just shy of her 91st birthday. (I’m really glad we threw her a big party last year on her 90th birthday). We will be attending a funeral—hopefully a tribute to her lovely life—this weekend.
Her death got me to thinking about the kind of life I hope I am leading. I hope I welcome people into my life with genuine warmth. I hope that people remember me fondly as someone who brightened their day. But I guess what I hope most is that I fulfill my life’s purpose, whatever that is, while bringing joy to others. I like to write jokes that hopefully make people laugh, or at least smile. I hope my life is a positive presence in the world that helped others along their journey.
Joke: Thank goodness for the food at family reunions; otherwise, my relatives probably would have nothing to talk about.
Quote: “We all die. The goal isn’t to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.”
– Chuck Palahniuk
Advice: When you give to other people, you are actually giving a gift to yourself.